If I had to describe the quintessential Matt and John lunch, today was that day.
We start out slow and sluggish on the ride to Wegman's:
The topics of discussion ranged from how our fantasy football teams performed on Sunday to part 2 of the Real Housewives of NJ reunion show (more on that later). It was a mellow discussion without a lot of gusto.
Gain momentum as we make very difficult food decisions:
I went all Indian food today and couldn't have been happier. The selection available at Wegman's defies description and when I die, I want to have a heart attack right into the food display with curry dripping off of my nose.
Reach a nice steady and heated pace as we dine:
Of course, as we scarfing down lunch, we had a passionate discussion about all things RHONJ. And it wasn't like we were laughing or joking. Serious psychological analysis was going on and we were way deep into it. We relived our live tweeting during the show the night before and were very proud of our accomplishment. Without fear of your wicked feedback, I give you just a sampling of our tweets:
And hits the ultimate crescendo of insanity as we "shop" after lunch:
Matt is in the know on all things nutrition and what is slowly killing us in our food and this pic below typifies what he does for minutes on end as we "shop":
Well, I'll let Matt carry it from here.
But not to bore you with my weird obsessions (we'll do that in another blog post), John pulled a move today that was right out of my book. He goes on a mad man hunt for this gluten free, wheat free, everything in the bag is just the best thing for you, etc., etc. etc 100% corn pasta,.
Here ya go
He finally finds the pasta he was looking for (all excited) only to make another mad dash now to the candy isle. We hit the candy isle so John can decide which M&M product he is going to devour at the 2:30 pm pick me up hour. Now we're not talking about a regular 2 oz bag of M&M's, oh no no no, he don't mess around my BFF. Holding the 2 bags of the gluten free, 100% corn pasta, he is analyzing how many calories are in the entire bag of M&M's with peanuts. Convinces himself that "they say" if your going to have M&M's stuffed with something, the peanuts are the healthier choice. He was so in the zone there was no way I was going to break his concentration. It was priceless.
Holding the 19 oz bag of dark chocolate M&M's with peanuts ("they say" that's the healthier choice) he now starts to calculate how many grams of sugar are in the whole bag since he knows this huge bag is not making it past 3pm (don't forget, he's still holding the gluten free pasta). After realizing the whole bag amounts to the same sugar in 5 cans of coke, he decides on Justin's organic peanut butter cups. C'mon wouldn't you have done the same thing? Yes, they do make'em organic and no I didn't buy'em. Weird going from all out 19 oz bag of happiness to something only seen on the Dr. Oz show. John had some tough decisions to make today and I lost him for a short while, but in the end my buddy found his way back home to healthy-ness. Way to go John.
You watch, corn pasta will be everywhere within the next two months. Guaranteed. Wheat is so last year and gluten free is in.
One last thing. While at checkout with our corn pasta, sugar free caramels and peanut butter cups, we were each asked "Would you like to donate a $1 to blah, blah, blah." I answered no thank you since I am anti charity and moved on. When Matt was asked the same thing, he answered with a big "I'm good".
"I'm good"? Oh, I didn't realize they were offering you a $1.
I'm still laughing about it.