Monday, January 23, 2012

Fashion advice

I lost track of what clothes/shoes were "trendy" back in 1994.

I've been wearing the same brand/type of jeans since Y2K.

Yes, my wife does most of my clothes shopping for me. I'm that guy. But I don't care, clothes mean so little to me any more.

Which brings me to today's gripe session. I cannot stand guys who wear trendy shoes. For whatever reason, it drives me mad.

To me, shoes are a lot like referees or umpires in sports. If you don't notice them, they are performing their job to perfection. If they look like like bowling shoes, I immediately question your sanity.

Take these shoes as an example:

I've seen a dude walk out of the men's room at work wearing almost these exact shoes. Are you kidding? I don't care if these are being worn on every runway or are featured in "Cool Guy" magazine, they're f'n hideous and you know it. You must be the type of person who wants to be known as "with it" and that means I'll never like you. I'm not joking.

Or maybe you have shoes like these:

Oh OK, I get it, you're "rugged, go hiking on the weekend guy" right? Go read GQ magazine and trim your eyebrows. Those buckles are a disgrace and so are you. I bet you even own a pastel colored sweater that all the young dudes are wearing today. Stop it already. 

I know, "Hey know-it-all, what kind of shoes do you wear?" Well, I'll show you:    
Now that is a classic, don't look at me shoe. I wear it with khakis and jeans and no one notices a thing. The way it should be. I can wear these for the next ten years and will never look out of place. I can spend my time on more important endeavors like fantasy baseball or playing Angry Birds.

I could not agree with you more my friend. The "Trendy Shoes" guy to me likes to show they are in touch with fashion and love to be different. I say "Ohhh good for youuuuu!!!!" They are also that same guy that loves to wear a lot of the other things I'm about to get into.

First, you have the "Cool Hat" guys. The guys that look like they have an Easter Bonnet on their head to me but act like everything is normal when they are speaking (while wearing the hat) and I should look at them as if nothing is odd.

The perfect example is none other then "Mr. Perfect", Tom Brady. Now we have to see more of "Mr. Trendy" and his "wanna be tough" rants on the sidelines since the Pats are going back to the Super Bowl. Ugh.

However, this look really sums it up for me. Like nails to a chalkboard.

Next you have the guys that wear their shirt half in their pants. The "Half Tucked" look or what I heard it being referred to as the "Shirt Mullet". Why? Who came up with this fashion trend that have some fashion wannabes walking around with a look that is simply sloppy and uncalled for. I guess they said "OK, lets develop a look that makes a man wear a horrendous looking belt buckle, tuck in just one side of the front part of his shirt. Put it in "GQ" or "Details" magazine and see if it sticks". Bingo! What do you know? It stuck and it has followers.

I am in no way the picture of fashion, but I hope they find that person who came up with this and make them watch the movie "Glitter" 30 times straight in a locked room. 
Jeans, T-Shirt and a Baseball hat on backwards is trendy enough for me!



  1. Must be a NJ thing, here my husband is happy to be able to outfit himself entirely from Sam's or Costco. Simple jeans, polo or rugby shirt, and Bass shoes (oops, not from Sams or Costco). Trendy? Who cares? hahaha

  2. Ok - what about that toolbag in the office that wears the pastel pink and blue sweaters (cashmere?) with his button down shirt untucked underneath, the trendy shoes, sometimes a dorky hat and walks around like he is hot s@#t? Every time I see him I want to punch him in the face.

  3. I came out of my lurky cave long enough to say...I understand what you're saying!!!!

  4. This dialogue is beginning to read like the City Mouse and the Country Mouse. Yes, there is a difference; and, sadly, one will never understand the other.
    Trends in male fashion have been around for centuries; people in densely populated urban areas are more sensitive and receptive to them than are suburban or rural folk. Ask a sociologist why; I forget.
    In the cold climate where I live, a man must cover his head in winter or he will be subject to sinus infections and head colds. However, wearing a baseball cap backwards is greeted with the same disdain that you and some of your readers have for those who dress trendily.
    In colder climates, Tom Brady's "cool" fedora is a necessity for professionals who wear a suit to work and the tuque that you describe as "fingernails on a chalkboard" is considered here, only 40 minutes away from world-class ski hills, to be a very attractive form of headgear for men of all ages. It is also basic gear for Bostonian athletes who jog outdoors in winter.
    That you guys are annoyed by what you see, simply reflects the contemporary values of where you live. Visit Manhattan and the sophisticated city folk there, taken aback by the way you dress in suburban New Jersey, might be equally critical of your comfortable, casual, no-nonsense style of dress, or of your indifference to, style, trends, and fashion.

  5. I hope it won't effect our working relationship :) I do like to wear trendy shoes and I don't see anything wrong with that

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